Venezuela, Jobs & Bitcoin: Oh My! 😱

Right then. So, the world’s still spinning, which is always a relief. Apparently, things are happening. Yes, things. Specifically, people are looking at employment figures, and someone – and honestly, it’s usually someone – has gone and mucked about with Venezuela. It seems they’ve… acquired a president and his wife. A bit like losing your keys, only with more international incidents and possibly fewer spare sets. 💥

The Americans, naturally, have decided to take charge of the Venezuelan oil industry. Because apparently, running a country wasn’t enough. Now they’re running the fuel supply too. This has, predictably, caused the price of oil to wobble like a jelly on a particularly bumpy cart. As for the crypto markets? Well, they’re holding their breath and trying very hard not to look directly at the chaos. So far, so good, though ‘resilient’ is probably just a polite word for ‘confused’.

“Volatility continues to be the norm as macroeconomic headwinds continue to shift rapidly,” said a letter from someone called Kobeissi. Which, frankly, is what anyone who’s ever tried to predict the future says. It’s a bit like saying ‘water is wet’. Profound, isn’t it? 🙄

Economic Happenings Jan 5 to 9 (Give or Take)

The stock markets, when they finally peel themselves out of their New Year’s recovery, will be having a good look at the Venezuelan incident. Crypto, though, is having a marginally better morning in Asia. Which, given the circumstances, is a bit like winning a raffle while standing in a volcano. Not ideal, but better than losing a shoe. Tuesday brings the ISM Manufacturing PMI, which measures how happy the machines are. Important stuff.

But the real excitement – if you can call impending economic doom ‘excitement’ – is on Wednesday with the ADP Nonfarm Employment report and JOLTS Job Openings data. Apparently, if enough people have jobs, the Federal Reserve might not panic and start giving money away. It’s a complicated system, designed by people who really enjoy making flowcharts.

Friday then throws the December Jobs Report and Consumer Sentiment data into the mix. More numbers! More stress! More opportunities for economists to sound important! 😵‍💫

Importantish Events This Week:

1. Venezuela – Still unfolding. Avoid eye contact. – Monday

2. Machines Feeling Happy/Sad – Tuesday

3. People With/Without Jobs – Wednesday

4. More People With/Without Jobs – Also Wednesday

5. How Grumpy Everyone Is – Friday

6. Some More Numbers – Whenever

– The Kobeissi Letter (@KobeissiLetter) January 4, 2026

Some chap named Eric Kuby, who has a rather grand title at North Star Investment Management, told Reuters that a slightly wobbly job market gives the Fed an “excuse” to do things. It’s good to know someone is finding silver linings in all this.

What About the Shiny Numbers (Crypto, That Is)?

The total value of all this digital magic is up a bit, almost 2% to $3.25 trillion. Apparently, that’s the highest it’s been since… well, since some other day involving numbers. Bitcoin, in a fit of optimism, briefly went above $93,000 before remembering it’s Bitcoin and falling back a bit. Ethereum also had a quick burst of enthusiasm, peaking at $3,200 before remembering who it is. And, because no list is complete without them, XRP, Dogecoin, Chainlink and a thing called Hyperliquid also did… something. 🤷

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2026-01-05 11:13