The grand total of the crypto market value slipped to about $3.14 trillion, which sounds like a hefty chunk of change until you realize it dropped just over 3% in a day. Oh, what fun! 🎢
Now, this fourth biggest cryptocurrency is still hanging out below the midline of those Bollinger Bands, currently chilling at $2.4254. Until XRP decides to get its act together and close above that level, the market is just going to see this bounce as a mere counter-trend move-like a kid trying to impress their parents with a half-hearted cartwheel.
President Monica Long, with the poise of a Tolstoy heroine, declared on January 6 that Ripple shall remain private. “Why dance in the public’s gaze,” she mused, “when our coffers overflow with $500 million raised in November 2025 at a $40 billion valuation? Our balance sheet is as robust as a Russian winter, and we shun the burdens of disclosure like a nobleman avoids taxes.” 😏
Behold, it tumbled from $2.41, shattering the fragile $2.32 support like a heart broken by the whims of fate. A precipitous plunge to $2.21 was met with the desperate embrace of buyers, allowing it to stagger back to its current perch. The question now hangs heavy in the air: will XRP ascend to reclaim $2.31-$2.32, or shall it be condemned to wander in the downward spiral of despair? 🌀
On Wednesday last, our dear Ethereum experienced a vital metamorphosis akin to that of a caterpillar into a butterfly-if, of course, the butterfly were inclined to engage in blockchain transactions. The blob limit has ascended from a modest 15 to an extravagant 21 as part of the second Blob Parameter-Only (BPO) hard fork. How delightful!
The sell-off follows a failed attempt at breaking above $94,500 on Tuesday, the third in the past five weeks. One might say the market is as persistent as a broken record. 🎶
At the stroke of 1:01 a.m. UTC on January 7, 2026, Ethereum embarked on a modest endeavor, increasing the per-block blob target from 10 to 14, and the maximum from 15 to 21 blobs. A 40% capacity expansion, which, in the grand scheme of things, is a small step for Ethereum, but a giant leap … Read more
As Bitcoin continues its ascent, so too do the perils that beset its holders. In 2026, selecting a wallet is not merely a matter of features but a question of survival. Malware, phishing scams, fake wallet apps, and browser attacks are the hydra-headed monsters of the digital realm. 🦖
In a thrilling X post that’ll make your socks tingle (or at least your portfolio), Glassnode spilled the beans on Bitcoin’s perp funding rates. Now, what’s a funding rate, you ask? It’s that cheeky little fee longs and shorts swap like trading cards at recess. Positive number? Bulls are charging like caffeinated elephants! 🐘
It mirrored the movements of Bitcoin and Ethereum, a pale imitation. Solana’s little climb above $130. It wasn’t a roar, more of a polite cough. Then, a fleeting glimpse of $142-a momentary defiance of gravity. And like all such things, a slippage, a retreat, a humbling return to the 50% Fib retracement level. Such drama!
