Oh, Metaplanet, you wild child! After a little crypto siesta, you’re back at it, hoarding Bitcoin like it’s the last slice of pizza at a Bridget Jones party. 🍕💰 And let’s just say, the markets are gagging (in the British sense, of course) at the scale of your shopping spree.
On December 30th, you dropped ¥69.855 billion (yes, you read that right) on 4,279 BTC. That’s like buying a whole wardrobe of sensible knickers and then some. Your Bitcoin stash now sits at a cool 35,102 BTC, making you one of the world’s biggest crypto hoarders. Go on, show off. 💅✨
Even after your little pause (we all need a break from the drama, don’t we?), you’re still the fourth-biggest public Bitcoin treasury company. Iconic. 👑
But here’s the kicker: you’re buying Bitcoin even when it’s trading below your average cost. That’s either genius or the financial equivalent of texting your ex at 2 a.m. We’ll see. 🥴📉
Funding Your Crypto Addiction: Equity, Debt, and a Dash of Chaos
So, how are you paying for all this? Oh, just a little equity issuance and some Bitcoin-backed loans. Casual. During Q4 2025, you took out $280 million in crypto-collateralized loans (because who needs sleep when you can have leverage?). And let’s not forget the ¥21.249 billion from issuing 23.61 million Class B preferred shares. Shareholder dilution? More like shareholder confusion. 🤪📈
Bitcoin: The New Centerpiece of Your Financial Drama
Bitcoin is now the star of your balance sheet, darling, and it’s bringing all the drama. As of December 30th, your average BTC purchase price is ¥15,945,691. With BTC trading below that, you’re sitting on over $500 million in unrealized losses. Ouch. That’s like realizing Mark Darcy was right all along-but worse. 😭💔
Management’s talking about “BTC Yield” and “BTC Gain” like they’re the next big diet craze, but let’s be real: they’re ignoring the debt and fair-value losses. Classic. 🙄
Are Shareholders the New Crypto Bagholders?
You’re calling this strategy “accretive,” but let’s call a spade a spade: dilution and leverage are through the roof. Fully diluted shares are at 1.459 billion, meaning Bitcoin exposure per share is up-but so is the risk of a financial meltdown. It’s like dating a bad boy; you know it’s risky, but you can’t resist. 😈💔
While BTC Yield is still positive, debt servicing and market volatility could turn this into a Bridget Jones-level disaster. Will shareholders end up with a tub of ice cream and a sad playlist? Only time will tell. 🍦🎵
Final Thoughts (Because We All Need Closure)
- Metaplanet’s Bitcoin binge is either genius or a financial rom-com gone wrong. Long-term conviction? Sure. But leverage and dilution risks? Yikes. 🤡💸
- Shareholder outcomes now hinge on Bitcoin recovering above your average cost. So, fingers crossed, light a candle, and maybe sacrifice a fiver to the crypto gods. 🕯️🙏
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2025-12-31 11:07