Ah, the crypto markets have decided to don their green party hats once more, swelling by 3.7% in total capitalization-a mere $120 billion added to the $2.43 trillion ledger of human folly. One might say it’s the financial equivalent of a peacock preening in a thunderstorm.
Santiment, that paragon of market wisdom, has declared that Bitcoin, after a brief flirtation with the $60,000 threshold, is now waltzing perilously close to the $70,000 mark. “The bullish narrative has predictably returned,” they proclaimed, as if the crowd hadn’t just been reduced to a pack of weeping hyenas two days prior. “FафOMO mode” has commenced, they added, as though panic and greed were ever truly distinct entities.
Bitcoin, ever the tease, has briefly kissed the $70,000 altar before retreating to the safety of $68,000 at the time of writing. A bull trap? My dear, it’s the only game in town-why not dance with the devil in the pale moonlight of a collapsing market?
Just two days after the crowd was bracing itself with a $60K retest, Bitcoin is now on the verge of returning back above $70K. The bullish narrative has predictably returned. In this chart:
High blue spikes indicate major predictions of $BTC moving lower. When retail sells, the drama escalates. A tragedy in five acts, really.
– Santiment (@santimentfeed) February 25, 2026
Ah, Chiefy, that oracle of doom, proclaims this to be the final bull trap of the cycle, with charts mirroring the 2022 chart like a bad opera. “BTC will dump to $44K in ten days,” they predict, as if the market were a marionette puppets to their whims. A bull trap, dear reader, is nothing more than a grand masquerade-a false dawn luring the unwary into the arms of liquidation, where they’ll be embraced with the warmth of a bear market.
PelinayPA, that sage of cryptoquants, points to the Fund Flow Ratio, a number so small it could be the last digit in a baker’s dozen. “A low ratio means fewer BTC are being sent to the exchange,” they explained, as if this were a revelation rather than a desperate attempt to find hope in the ruins.
“This setup may slow the downside momentum and ‘pave the way for a relief rally,’” they added, as though relief and rallies were ever more than fleeting illusions spun by the market’s loom.
“In particular, if the ratio remains low, any upward price reaction could create the conditions for a strong short squeeze.” Ah yes, because what the world needs is more chaos disguised as opportunity.
Analyst ‘Bull Theory’ offers a different narrative: since Jane Street’s manipulation ceased, the market has added $200 billion in 48 hours. One might say it’s the financial equivalent of a phoenix rising from ashes-only to realize the ashes are still smoldering.
“For the first time in two months, no relentless selling has been seen for two consecutive days.” A miracle? Or simply the market taking a breath before the next plunge?
Michaël van de Poppe, that titan of MN Fund, declares, “The current valuation of Bitcoin is extremely low,” as if valuations were ever a reliable compass in this realm of madness. Whether it’s Jane Street’s manipulations, gamma plays, or software companies conspiring to drown BTC in a sea of despair, the answer is always the same: buy the dip, but never forget the dip is a bottomless pit.
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2026-02-26 10:05