Thiel Bails on ETHzilla: From Crypto to Jet Engines, What’s Next?

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Well, grab your popcorn and your blockchain decoder ring, folks, because Peter Thiel’s Founders Fund has officially ghosted ETHzilla Corp. faster than a bad Tinder date. According to a U.S. SEC filing, Thiel’s crew has dumped their entire 7.5% stake, which they so proudly flaunted back in August. Turns out, the crypto market’s rollercoaster ride and the October 2025 flash crash were just too much for their fancy algorithms to handle. So, they sold over $100 million in ether to pay the bills and buy back some dignity. Because, you know, nothing says “I’m serious about finance” like liquidating your assets in a panic.

A Volatile Transition From Biotech to “What Were We Thinking?”

So, billionaire Peter Thiel-yes, the same guy who probably has a secret lair under a volcano-and his Founders Fund have officially cut ties with ETHzilla Corp. According to a U.S. SEC filing (because nothing says “drama” like government paperwork), Thiel’s team is now as involved with ETHzilla as I am with my New Year’s resolutions. Bloomberg reported that their 7.5% stake is now a distant memory, like my dreams of becoming a professional napper.

ETHzilla, based in the sunny tax haven of Palm Beach, Florida, decided in 2025 that biotech was so last season and pivoted to becoming a digital asset treasury focused on ether. Because, obviously, the future is in volatile tokens, not curing diseases. At their peak, they held over 100,000 ETH tokens, but the crypto market had other plans. After the flash crash, they were forced to liquidate assets faster than a Black Friday sale, selling $40 million in October and another $74.5 million in December. All to fund buybacks and repay debt. Because nothing says “we’re totally fine” like selling your assets in chunks.

This whole situation is basically a financial soap opera, complete with plot twists and bad decisions. The October 10, 2025, flash crash was like the season finale of Crypto Gone Wild, where the entire market lost $20 billion in leveraged positions in a matter of hours. Since then, the crypto economy has been deleveraging harder than a reality TV star after a scandal, shrinking from $4.3 trillion to a mere $2.4 trillion. Ouch. Even the biggest bitcoin treasury firm, Strategy, is now nursing $6 billion in paper losses. Someone get them a participation trophy.

But fear not, because ETHzilla has a bold new plan: tokenizing jet engines. Yes, you read that right. Through their subsidiary, ETHzilla Aerospace, they’re offering blockchain-based equity in leased jet engines. Because if there’s one thing the world needs, it’s more ways to gamble on aviation assets. This pivot is like going from selling lemonade to launching a space program. Ambitious? Sure. Logical? Debatable. Entertaining? Absolutely.

FAQ ❓

  • Why did Peter Thiel exit ETHzilla? Probably because he realized crypto is less stable than a Jenga tower in an earthquake. Officially, his Founders Fund sold their 7.5% stake.
  • What was ETHzilla’s original business model? They rebranded in 2025 to focus on ether holdings, because biotech was too mainstream.
  • How did the crypto downturn affect ETHzilla? They sold over $100 million in ether to stay afloat after the 2025 crash. Because nothing says “financial stability” like a fire sale.
  • What’s ETHzilla’s new strategy? Tokenizing jet engines, because why not? Through ETHzilla Aerospace, they’re bridging digital assets with tangible infrastructure. Or, as I like to call it, “crypto meets Top Gun.”

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2026-02-19 01:57