Crypto Chaos: Bitcoin Wobbles, Ripple Insures, Dogecoin Creator Facepalms

Ah, the crypto market-where numbers dance more wildly than a toddler on a sugar high. Bitcoin, the granddaddy of digital currencies, is currently doing the financial fandango, dropping to $67,000 as traders hold their breath for the CPI report. It’s like waiting for the results of a paternity test, but with more zeros and fewer soap opera twists. Meanwhile, Ripple is busy cozying up to the U.K. insurance market, because apparently, tokenizing insurance is the new black. And Dogecoin’s creator, Billy Markus, is rolling his eyes so hard at the latest Satoshi theories that I’m surprised he hasn’t sprained something.

Hovering around $67,000 like a nervous guest at a party, eyeing the $64,500 support level like it’s the last slice of pizza.

  • Ripple and XRP: Diving into the U.K.’s £300 billion insurance pool with Aviva Investors, because why not make blockchain the life jacket of finance?
  • Dogecoin: Billy Markus calls Epstein-Satoshi theories “negative IQ” speculation, which is the nicest way to say someone’s brain is on vacation.
  • BTC price action: Why $69,000 is now the bouncer at the crypto club

    Bitcoin took a nosedive to $66,370 on Binance, as if it tripped over its own ledger. Investors are split between staring at labor reports and CPI data like they’re reading tea leaves. Since its February peak, BTC has shed 6%, which in crypto terms is roughly equivalent to losing your car keys. The $69,000 resistance level has flipped faster than a pancake at IHOP, leaving traders wondering if they should brace for impact or buy more dip.

    Today’s Non-Farm Payrolls report is the financial equivalent of a weather forecast-nobody really knows what’s coming, but everyone’s got an opinion. A print above 72K? Dollar party. Below 60K? Crypto rally. Mixed data? Intraday volatility, aka the financial version of a rollercoaster with a blindfold.

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    Goldman Sachs Holding $152M in XRP

    The $64,500 support level is now the last line of defense, like the final slice of cake at a party. If it breaks, $60,000 is next, and nobody wants to go there. On the upside, overcoming $69,000 resistance would be like finally getting past the bouncer at the club-possible, but you’ll need a good story.

    Ripple to tokenize U.K. insurance market on XRPL

    Ripple has decided to tokenize the U.K. insurance market, because apparently, blockchain is the new black. Partnering with Aviva Investors, they’re bringing traditional fund structures to the XRP Ledger, which is like teaching your grandma to TikTok-impressive, but who’s really benefiting? Nigel Khakoo from Ripple called it a “large-scale deployment phase,” which is corporate speak for “we’re making this happen, folks.”

    We’re thrilled to announce that @Ripple is partnering with Aviva Investors to bring traditional fund structures to the XRP Ledger. This marks our first collaboration with a European investment management firm to tokenize real-world assets (RWAs) at scale.

    By leveraging the…

    – Reece Merrick (@reece_merrick) February 11, 2026

    The XRP Ledger, with its four billion transactions and seven million wallets, is like the reliable friend who always shows up on time. Its ESG-friendly credentials are a hit with institutions, because who doesn’t love a blockchain that doesn’t destroy the planet?

    “Negative IQ”: Dogecoin founder dismisses latest Satoshi theories

    Billy Markus, the Dogecoin cofounder, has had it with the latest Satoshi Nakamoto theories. When someone suggested Jeffrey Epstein might be Bitcoin’s creator, Markus responded with a scathing “negative IQ” verdict, which is the polite way of saying, “Are you kidding me?” He pointed out the absurdity of Epstein needing introductions to Bitcoin devs if he were the mastermind, which is like claiming you invented the wheel but still need a Lyft.

    ‘Like why would he be asking Jason Calacanis for an introduction the bitcoin developers when he literally worked with them’ – Billy Markus (Shibetoshi Nakamoto) on X

    Market watchlist: Next 24 hours

    Friday’s CPI print is the main event, like the finale of a reality show but with more spreadsheets. If labor data cools, a lower-than-expected CPI could send digital assets soaring like a rocket-or at least like a slightly deflated balloon. Bitcoin’s vulnerability below $69,000 is like a weak handshake-unimpressive but not entirely hopeless. Meanwhile, XRP is busy gaining real-world utility, which is more than can be said for most of us.

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    2026-02-11 17:36